Voted "Best Blog With No Readers", 2009 Blogspot Awards.

Saturday, January 31, 2009

Saturday, January 24, 2009

Here Comes the Rolex 24

Here's my Rolex 24 Pre-Race Rundown:

There are some notable absences. The Rolex 24 has seen a bunch of NASCAR stars in previous years: Tony Stewart, Dale Jr., Bobby Labonte, and Matt Kenseth, among others. Not so many this time. Not all of the IRL drivers I expected are here, either. Helio I can understand, but Dan Wheldon? Tony Kanaan? I can't figure that out. They're too good to miss this one.

Anyways, here's how I handicap it:

DP Class

01: Won it all last year with mostly the same lineup; I look for them to repeat.

02: Ran well last year until car troubles put them in 44th place.

2: Danica Patrick brings star power, but the real stars are Andy Wallace and Casey Mears. Unfortunately, they have a Crawford chassis.

7: Timo Bernhard is one of the best Porsche 911 drivers on the planet, and Ryan Briscoe can drive an Indy car well sometimes, if he doesn't pull something stupid. However, they're not driving a 911 or an Indy car. The good news is that it's a Penske entry.

10: Max the Axe leads a strong lineup here, for an experienced team. With some luck, they could win.

16: Another Penske entry, with Bernhard and Briscoe, plus Romain Dumas. That adds up to talent. We'll see.

22: Here's the sleeper. Dalziel, Enge, Ducote, Dumolin, and de Quesada. There's a lot of talent in this ride. I'm eager to see if they can pull it off.

45: Danger Mouse and The Prince? They won't win, but let's see which one wrecks it.

58 and 59: Brumos always runs well until the car breaks down. It'll be the same story this year; just watch and wait.

99: Another sleeper, although having Jimmy Vasser and Jimmie Johnson makes them a little more wakeful. They've got a shot if the 01 and 02 have troubles.

GT Class

07: Plenty of talent here, with a proven team and Pontiac car. Don't count them out.

33: Wright Motorsports has hired some good drivers, but they're not a Rolex Series regular.

40: Dempsey Racing? Never mind. Have fun, Patrick.

66: The Racer's Group usually has two strong entries. This is one.

67: This is the other. This one has better talent. I'll pick them to win in GT.

69: This team won the GT class last year, and is back with an identical lineup. That makes them an automatic contender. It's nice to see a rotary-engine Mazda up front again.

85-89: Farnbacher Loles throws five cars into the mix. It's a good team in general; with some luck they might get a podium finish. Or not.

Sunday, January 18, 2009

It's the Helmet

So why did Speed Racer flop so miserably at the box office? And why is Boba Fett such a favorite among Star Wars fans?

Answer: It's the helmet.

No, seriously. This is why Speed Racer failed:

Even Milka Duno couldn't rescue that.

This is why Boba Fett is so popular:

Any questions?

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

#5: Charlie Wenzel

Either Charlie has changed his name, or people still come up to him and say, "Hey, aren't you that guy from the Pirate 4x4 Forums?"

For a (relatively brief) summary, try this link.

Lessons to be learned: 1. You're not really anonymous on the internet, 2. Pulling a fast one will get you busted, and most importantly:

3. Don't be a complete jerk. A little humility would have saved poor Charlie a world of trouble.

Monday, January 5, 2009

#4: Leeroy Jenkins

When the history of the world is written, World of Warcraft will be credited with destroying civilization.

Leeroy Jenkins will earn a footnote. I don't really know why this clip is so popular, but I'm not a WoW player either.

Sunday, January 4, 2009

#3: Holly Dolly

It all started with a popular Finnish folk song written back in the early 1930's, called Ievan Polka.

This song was covered by a Finnish a capella group called Loituma in 1995.

Then in 2006, somebody (nobody's sure who) used it as background music for an anime clip, which became a viral hit on the web.

This led to a new arrangement of the old song, with a video featuring a singing donkey named Holly Dolly.

Now there are more variations than you can shake a leek at. I like the reggaeton remix, myself.

Saturday, January 3, 2009

#2: The Wilhelm Scream

This is to netizens what an ollie is to skaters: if you don't know what it is, just print a big sign that says "NOOB" and tape it to your chest.

Allow me to initiate you:

Friday, January 2, 2009

In case you missed it...

This week I'll be posting some internet classics for all of you Ric Romeros out there. If you're late to the party, here's your chance to catch up.

#1: Going all the way back to 1998: The Hampster Dance

Thursday, January 1, 2009

How Do You Say...

"Happy New Year" in French?

By burning a thousand cars, apparently. Some people drink champaign, kiss, and sing Auld Lang Syne. Others commit millions of dollars' worth of vandalism.

There's a certain reluctance in the media to speak plainly about this. They use terms like "disaffected youths", "underprivileged communities", and "run-down banlieues". They seem very reluctant to mention the religion of the car-burners.

There are plenty of disaffected, underprivileged Catholics in France, but they're not burning cars. Can you guess who is? Think "religion of peace".

Reading List

  • Man Is Wolf to Man, by Janusz Bardach
  • Don't Swallow Your Gum! by Aaron Carroll & Rachel Vreeman
  • Instant Replay, by Jerry Kramer and Dick Schaap
  • New York, by Edward Rutherford
  • The Mother Tongue, by Bill Bryson

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